I went to this place Anne Lamott once called a bad neighborhood--
my mind
I contemplated judgment in me
source of my anxiety and insecurity
it was a dark place, a place that scares me
but I was not afraid
because I wasn't alone
the one who knows me nevertheless loves me went there with me
I watched the birth of judgment
how it took a form and rooted deeply in me
how it tangled its vines around me
at times chocking me
almost knocked me down
I deeply desired to be liberated from it
and prayed
And I remembered
all the people Jesus healed
how they needed to have the courage to live a healed and transformed life
without going back to the old habits and patterns.
When I desire liberation
I also need the courage to embrace the challenges that come with liberation
it's Christ who heals
it's me who lives out a new life
